Left Outside Alone
This is weird because, in a lot of ways, this will be the first ACTUAL blog post I’ve written since setting this puppy up. Which is fine, because clearly that’s the point of it and stuff. But it’s kind of scary, not because it’s personal, but because it’s the first thing I will have written about people in my life in a while that, down the track, there is an actual chance of said people reading.
As I’ve said in the ‘About Me’ page, the things that I’ll be writing here aren’t necessarily intended to be things I want to discuss in real life. They’re not always even going to be things that I’d mean in real life, if that makes sense. Kind of like they’re often going to be half-formed thoughts that I’m still in the midst of processing and this site is kind of the machine I need to feed them through in order to work out exactly what I even think of them. So, I guess, take them with a grain of salt in the sense that I mean them in the exact moment I’ve written them but they’re not intended to be my final answer on things.
Anyways! As you may or may not know, Glenny actually kind of dated someone at the end of last year. Only for about a month, but that’s more than he’s really done in, oh, three years or so? Unfortunately, he also committed that cardinal friendship sin of the whole debacle being committed with a good friend of a good friend. I probably should have put a *spoiler alert* before I used the phrase ‘whole debacle’ since it clearly gives away how it ended.. It was awful. Like, heart-crushingly awful. To be fair to Matty, part of it was due to the fact that I just had not liked someone in years. I guess I’ve met guys that I’ve thought were cute, or nice, or whatever. But no one who is real relationship potential. Ever since Michael, I’ve found it weird to transition back from ‘love of life’ to ‘kind of like’. It’s hard to go backwards, I guess.
So, anyway, Matty was the first guy in three years that I saw even the possibility of something special. And then, a month in, he just had a big freak out and broke things off. Which, to be fair, is totally fine. Like, I didn’t respect it, but I didn’t begrudge it either. Sometimes things just don’t work out, you know.. The only thing really sucked was the fact that he turned into a total douchebag afterwards. Like, started being really cunty in a deliberate way (excuse the language, but it’s pretty accurate – you know, besides the obvious vaginal connotations.. Wow! It just took me three goes to spell the word ‘connotations’ right. How embarrassing.) And this is where it was kind of hard to deal with.
I’m not an idiot, right. Like, I know the friendship etiquette with these things. Just like in the early days, you don’t discuss the dating things with the mutual friend, when things go pear-shaped, you leave them out of it as well. Which is fine. But it’s weird, you know, like how in a friendship that you previously discussed anything and everything, suddenly there’s this wall, this big gay elephant in the room that you both see but can’t acknowledge. And it’s fucking awkward.
I guess that’s the thing, really. For the last few months, fairly or not, I felt kind of abandoned by both my friend Marc and a few people in that group of friends. Not that I wanted him to have big conversations about it with me or anything, but just some sort of acknowledgement that “Hey Glenn, what Matty did to you was kind of shitty. But don’t worry, I’m still your friend too..” and I kind of feel like I didn’t get that. I’m not even saying that that is the right thing or what needed to happen but, suddenly, I just felt like my friend drifted away and that I drew the short straw in some sort of gay homosexual divorce settlement that I never wanted to happen in the first place.
Because I actually really made such a gigantic effort NOT to make things awkward for our fifty million mutual friends. There were no sobbing status updates on facebook. There was no disparaging remarks made about Matty to anyone that knew him. There were no attempts ever to discuss any of this. Like, literally to the point that, the other day when Matty was back in town for the week, I deliberately pulled back and didn’t try to see Marc so he wouldn’t be in any awkward position where he felt like he had to choose. I didn’t go to any of the bars or clubs that I knew they were likely to go to so there wasn’t any social tension.
The stupidest fucking part of the whole thing was that I didn’t even want Matty and I in the same room together to be this oil and water, one or the other kind of deal. Sure, after he said he didn’t want to date any more I told him that, in the immediate aftermath, I didn’t want to see him for a while in order to lick my wounds and heal, but I wasn’t rude or spiteful about it either. And I deliberately extended a olive branch to him a few weeks later when I was finally at the point that I could genuinely mean it without some sort of ulterior motive. But he said ‘no thanks’ in the most deliberately asshole-ish and hurtful way possible. Which was good, actually, because it made me realise what a bullet I’d dodged, so it was kind of comforting in that sense.
But despite all this I’m left feeling like I lost one of my best friends in the deal and I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know if the feeling I’m feeling is in any way real or if it’s all in my head. Life is weird sometimes, you know? Like two people can be in the exact same place at the exact same time but see two totally different things. And since my feelings are hurt, I haven’t yet found a way to be the bigger man and address it instead of just pulling back. But sometimes in interpersonal relationships, you need the other person to make the effort.
I think what I said before kind of hit the nail on the head for me. Like, I’m fine with the fact that Marc is closer to Matty than he is to me. I knew that going in and I factored that into my decision making process when I decided to take this crazy gamble in the first place. But I never realised what it would feel like to literally have this conversational no go zone always hanging in between us. It’s like I built a wall now where there used to be an open field and I can’t knock it down because it’s not mine to withdraw.
*sadface*
Have kind of got the reverse going on with my friend Alex at the moment. Alex is one of my absolute best friends in the whole world from when I lived in the UK. You know those friends that, due to the way the cards fall in life, you might not see for years at a time, but you’ll always count them as a best friend til the day you die? Well, that’s how I’ve felt about Alex ever since I met him six years ago.
I was on facebook the other day and saw a photo album of his trip to South America that he just got back from. It took me a moment to realise, but one of the guys in the photo’s was my ex Michael. Like, ‘The Offical Love of My Entire Life to Date’ Michael. And not just Michael, but one of his best friends that was a total ass to me in the aftermath of our oh so painful breakup but also there was Michael’s ex before who, without going into a two hundred page story of our sordidly complicated history, was literally like one of my arch-nemesis’s in life and is one of the main reasons my relationship with Michael broke up into so many painful little pieces.
And I don’t know how to feel about it. Like Alex and Michael became good friends while Michael and I were dating. And I know they stayed friends afterwards, because they had the advantage of now both living closer to each other (Michael in Manhattan and Alex in London) than either are now to me. But the whole thing just feels so incredibly disloyal yet I feel like I can’t say that to Alex. I’m the first to say that I think it’s retarded when two people break up that their friends should have to pick sides. It’s immature. But, I think there is also a point where, if one person in the break up is clearly in the wrong and done something awful to the other, that if I were a friend caught in the crossfire, I would stand up and make a point of defended the friend that was wronged. Especially when I historically was friends with that person first. I just think it’s a loyalty thing. And it fucking hurts that I don’t think I’m getting that courtesy back.
One of the things that is a constant struggle for me in life is accepting that people don’t have the same values as I have. And I don’t mean that in some sort of superior or martyrish way, because it’s not that. It’s just that loyalty to friends and standing up for them when people do the wrong thing by them is something that I’m fiercely proud of. And it sucks when you wake up and realize that a lot of people wouldn’t do the same for you.
Oh well. That’s the thing. Real friendship is so many shades of grey that I accept that these are issues that I can’t raise in real life. So thanks for listening to me rambled through them and try to process them in my own personal space.
In other news, I just got a haircut this morning and now have the sneaking suspicion that I look like a Conehead. Going to sleep on it and see how I feel tomorrow but think it might be time I reached for the clippers and did ‘a Britney’ so to speak. Even though that’s sooooo 2007..
Glee’s top 10 best songs so far..
On Monday, Channel 10 will start screening the rest of Season 2 Glee. Having peaked into my crystal ball, I know there are some pretty amazing showstoppers coming up, including Tina and Mercedes doing a fab take on Dog Days Are Over and a very sexy Kurt and Blaine duet on the classic Baby It’s Cold Outside. So, what better time than now to run through the musical highlights of Glee to date!
( Note – in a perfect world, Lea Michele and Idina Menzel’s absolutely gorgeous stripped back piano rendition of Poker Face would be nestled in the top ten somewhere, but there appears to be no high-quality clips of it on youtube anywhere *sadface* )
01 – Teenage Dream
Seriously Avril Lavigne, What The Hell?
As those of you who peruse the internets may be aware, Avril Lavigne ‘dropped’ the video clip to her new single What The Hell over the weekend. Now, in honour of my mother always telling me ‘”if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”, here are five things that I like about Avril’s new video :-
01 – In the short space of 3 minutes and 45 seconds, she manages to squeeze literally twenty-seven separate pieces of irrelevant product placement into the proceedings. Even Grand Pop Dame Britney Spears has only ever made it to the high teens in any one video. Good work French Month Of April, good work!
02 – I like the fact that she’s clearly not intimidated singing a song that is so clearly out of her range. I mean, the notes required on the bridge in particular are basically in a different solar system to anything Av’s can hit without help from her good friend The Auto-tune Fairy.
03 – The song is kind of catchy. Not catchy in a ‘Hey Hey You You I Don’t Like Your Girlfriend’ kind of way, but more in a ‘Let Go album track’ way.
04 – The face / hand gesture combo she whips out at the 1:25 mark is the most delightfully absurd thing I’ve seen since Cher tried to move her face during Burlesque.
05 – The guy is really hot. Actually, this makes me dislike her even more, because it’s such a waste. Urgh, sometimes Avril is just the WORST.
Fun Pop FACT – Losing Grip is the best song she has ever recorded, ever. No wonder she looks so miserable all the time, girlfriend basically blew her load by peaking with the first track on her first ever album. That’s a long time to be headed downhill.
You Never Saw The Best Of Me
Just a little something I wrote this morning in about thirty minutes. Always love it when I get that and literally the whole song, in order, comes out of nowhere start to finish. There’s nothing more tedious than fine-tuning a track..
It’s kind of a big piano 80’s power-ballad (no, no – come back!) like you’d find Heart or Bonnie Tyler or such doing back in the day. Not overblown or anything though, quite stripped back until the chorus and the middle eight, it’s all about the melody and the vocals doing the work, not the production. I actually wrote it with Cher in mind which surprises me more than anyone since I can count all of the Cher songs I know literally on one hand. From the few tracks of hers back in the 70’s and 80’s I remember though, she has a pretty good, blues-ey voice when it’s brought to the forefront (unlike the autotuned trainwreck that was everything she’s ever done, ever post-Believe.)
‘you never saw the best of me’
shining
shining like a diamond in the setting sun
alone
reflecting all the light that came from ya
and as darkness fall
and i don’t light up the room
the way you wanted me to
and i can’t turn to you…
because you turned away
you never saw the best of me
you never saw me at all
you only saw my flaws
and when things got bad you never stuck around til they were through
you never saw the best of me, did you?
you never saw the best of me
falling
falling through the night like a dying star
crying
crying to myself cuz i don’t know where you are
and as morning comes
and i don’t know what to do
because i can’t rely on you
and i know that we’re through…
but i can finally see
you never saw the best of me
you never saw me at all
you only saw my flaws
and when things got bad you never stuck around til they were through
you never saw the best of me, did you?
you never saw the best of me
and when the darkness falls
and there’s nothing left at all
and there’s no one here to call
but i still know myself
and i am lucky as hell
and you can go to hell
(spoken) yeah, you can go to hell…
you never saw the best of me
you never saw me at all
you only saw my flaws
and when things got bad you never stuck around til they were through
you never saw the best of me, did you?
you never saw the best of me
you never saw the best of me
(you never saw the best of me, the rest of me..)
you never saw the best of me
(you never saw the best of me, the rest of me is the best of me)
you never saw the best of me
(spoken) you never saw the best of me.
So, yeah. I guess it’s clearly started with the way I felt in the aftermath of the whole Matty debacle, but it’s a lot more than that. A lot of it is a response to feelings that seeing Blue Valentine brought up about my Mum and the breakdown of her relationship to my step-dad over the last few years. I like to think of it as one of the more universal things I’ve written, that it’s a feeling that a lot of people can relate to, and hopefully draw strength from..
The 14th of April Cannot Come Soon Enough..
And I can’t think of a single thing I would have wanted to wake up to this morning more! This really is looking more and more amazing with each trailer. Even if Courtney Cox’s face is starting to look like a brunette clown in a power suit..
Top 50 songs of 2010: The Top 10!
(Originally published here on 31st December 2010)
And here we are on New Year’s Eve with our final countdown of the top ten tracks of 2010!
All the songs are completely different and all completely deserving – let us know what you think…
10 : Teenage Dream – Katy Perry
2010 was truly the year of Katy Perry. Never more so than on this, a soaring piece of power pop rock that wouldn’t have been out of place on a 100% Hits – Best of 1987 compilation. While monster hit California Gurls was stupid as I Kissed A Girl was pointlessly slutty, Teenage Dream proved that Perry could bring a real yearning emotional sincerity to her admitted knack for writing the perfect pop hook.
The amazing acapella performance of the song by Glee dreamboat Darren Criss almost earned an entry in its own right.
09 : Once – Diana Vickers
Originally intended to be the lead single for the 2010 Cathy Dennis comeback that approximately zero people were clamouring for. Thankfully, Dennis had a change of heart and gave this to 2008 UK X-Factor 4th place finisher Vickers to launch her critically-acclaimed debut album instead. A pure explosion of fizzy summer pop built around a piano line Coldplay would sell their first born for (that would be you, Apple Martin – sorry), before literally exploding in a musical orgy of electric guitars and new wave synths, made all the better by Vickers’s distinctive and alluringly husky vocals.
08 : 3 Words – Cheryl Cole
For one brief, shining moment in early 2010, it looked like Cheryl Cole might just parlay her UK fame over to Australian radio, with this hypnotic will.i.am collaboration blowing up on radio everywhere. Sadly, that wasn’t the case, but 3 Words set a benchmark for club friendly dance pop that was tough to beat. A glacial, robotic love song that basically sounded like exactly the kind of thing that Kylie Minogue has been trying to repeat ever since Can’t Get You Out Of My Head, the icy harmonies produced the most danceable ode to true love and fidelity of the year. Shame her marriage to footballer Ashley Cole ended in a massive cheating scandal about three weeks later.
07 : On A Mission – Gabriella Cilmi
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ycmQpXWwT0c
The single cover to this may as well have, in retrospect, just featured a tombstone for Cilmi’s career (2007 – 2010 R.I.P.) which was stopped dead in its tracks with this balls to the wall disco anthem. Which is a real pity it was clearly one of the most fun tracks released all year with a frenetic disco beat, a gigantic earworm of a chorus and one of the best vocal performances the pop world has seen in years with Cilmi’s growling vocals really letting loose in a way only a real singer can. Plus, the video combined sexiness with just the right balance of camp and knowing irony – running on the spot! Bikini’s in space! Cilmi ripping her top right open to visually punctuate the word ‘woman’! Brilliant.
06 : Only Girl (In The World) – Rihanna
2010 was a tough year for young Rihanna. Unprecedented interest in her personal life following Chris Brown Domestic Violence-Gate didn’t translate into album sales for the brilliantly-realised gloompop extravaganza Rated R. Turns out all the record buying public wanted was a full throttle poppers o’clock eurodance extravaganza, which Rihanna delivered in spades with Only Girl (In The World). New album Loud followed suit, although the subsequent Pauline Hanson-aping hairdo and apparent early onset Alzheimers (as hinted by following singles What’s My Name, Who’s That Chick and the general fact that she repeatedly seems to forget to wear her clothes in public) were causes for concern. Now, all we need is for Courtney Act to release a reworked karaoke dance cover retitled Only Gay (In The World). Get to it Shane!
05 : Need You Now – Lady Antebellum
If Taylor Swift took country-pop to new levels of credibility and commercial success in 2010, then Lady Antebellum were the ones that added a stone cold classic to the canon of all time great songs with this ode to loneliness and the dangers of drunk dialling. The “It’s a quarter after one and I’m a little drunk and I need you now” chorus might be the most heartbreakingly vunerable moment in music of the whole year, let alone one of the best vocal performances. Nothing on their follow up album came close to matching this, but with a song this good, who cares?
04 : Don’t Fucking Tell Me What To Do – Robyn
Who would have thought that Swedish pop pixie Robyn, she of all the heartfelt tear-stained dancefloor fillers, would be responsible for releasing what might be the angriest song of 2010? Starting off with classic opening line “my drinking’s killing me..” repeated on loop, this explodes into a long sinister list of all the things that are ‘killing’ Robyn in 2010 (her drinking, diet, heels, manager, ego, record label, PMS etc.) over dark dance beats before breaking down to the title phrase being ominously threatened to the listener over and over. Sounded nothing like anything else that came out of the hugely successful Body Talk Parts 1, 2 and 3 Project that she spent most of 2010 releasing and was all the more thrilling for it. Unlike The Incredible Hulk, you can’t help but like Robyn a whole lot more when she’s angry.
03 : Telephone – Lady Gaga
After Bad Romance went and catapulted Lady Gaga from pop megastar to being the single most famous and respected musician on the planet, you wondered how on earth she was ever going to be able to top it. The short answer is, she couldn’t (not yet, anyway) but with this, she came awful close. A barnstorming, dancefloor filling romp of a song, it was as inescapable on radio as its trailblazing video was, well, everywhere. Damned near one of the best things Beyonce has ever put her name to as well – just be grateful that it’s not Britney Spears popping up in the Pussy Wagon, as was originally intended before she turned it down. Twice.
02 : Don’t You Wanna Share The Guilt – Kate Nash
Excuse the shoddy myspace link for this (although, it’s full length and high quality), but it is the only place you can find the album version of this song online without legally downloading it. Which is a shame as this was a real contender for the #1 song on the list. Unlike anything else that came out in 2010, it starts with nothing but a softly strummed guitar with Nash recounting a encounter with an ex boyfriend, whispering small and irrelevant details that are so intimate that feel like you’re in the room as the instrumention slowly builds around it. Then something that can’t be described as anything other than musically magical happens – at the 3:24” mark the orchestra kicks in, the pace doubles and Nash breaks into a whirling stream of consciousness about her social neuroses, travel plans, childhood memories and everything in-between, spilling out of her like urgent secrets that can no longer can be contained before fading out. The demo and live versions floating around on youtube never match this for the productions takes the storytelling to an almost transportative level unmatched by any other release this year.
01 : Kickstarts – Example
A British rap and rave hybrid sounds like something that should be topping a list of worst tracks of the year, not best. But this, the commercial breakthrough for up and coming British rapper Example, shattered expectations with it’s breath- taking blend of clubby beats, emotive spoken word and the kind of wistful but bruised lyrics that the word bittersweet was invented to describe. The more hardcore club edges are beautifully tempered by one of the biggest and most pop-tastic choruses of the year. Grown up pop didn’t come more appealing, thrilling or accessible in 2010 than this absolutely perfect gem of a track. Best song of the year, hands down.
An Open Letter To Sandra Bullock..
Dear Sandra Bullock, I know you’ve had a rough trot recently with the divorce and the cheating scandal and whatnot, but it’s no excuse to go to the Golden Globes dressed as the little girl from The Ring..
Dear John
(Originally posted here on 4th January 2011)
I figured I’d write this here since I can’t actually write it to you and I can’t say it to my friends on account of us having about eleventy billion of them in common.
Top 50 songs of 2010: #30-11
(Originally posted here on the 29th December 2010. Again, thanks to Makersten for the awesome intro line..)
Desperate divas, breakneck beatmakers, a back-to-work boyband and a sweary Cee-Lo jostle for position as our countdown of the year’s biggest tracks continues.
Welcome to Part Two of our countdown of the 50 top tracks of 2010!
You can catch up with Part One here.
As before, make sure to comment below with any songs that you think can’t be missed, that you can’t believe we included, or just ones that you’re glad to have discovered.
30 : Make Me Wanna Die – The Pretty Reckless
Sure, Taylor Momsen pretty much looks like a walking STD these days, but there is no denying that this is actually a pretty kick ass tune. Besides, if you’re going to play dress-ups in a fading rockstar’s old clothes, you could do a lot worse than Courtney Love’s cast offs circa 1996. Who knew Little J was just as adept at writing a gut-wrenching tune as she is at over-applying eyeliner?
29 : Bang! Bang! – Liz Phair
One of the most sexy and obliquely desolate tracks of the year off indie-pop goddess Phair’s controversial Funstyle release. Right until the very end, it’s never clear whether she wants to f*ck or blow her brains out, or both. Sure, the album may have divided fans when she tried to be the new Ke$ha but, when she’s content to just be the new Liz Phair, this is proof that is no one does it better.
28 : Love The Way You Lie – Eminem & Rihanna
Because exactly what we needed in 2010 was a new Domestic Violence anthem for Wife Beaters worldwide. A disturbingly well-rounded dissection of both sides of the story, Love The Way You Lie reminded us that Eminem’s fame wasn’t based on throwaway puerile pop tunes as much it was ability to use rap music to create affecting character studies. Finally, after ten long years, Stan has a worthy successor.
27 : On Your Side – Danielle Spencer
The fact that Danielle Spencer isn’t mentioned in the same breath as Tori Amos, Regina Spektor et al will always be considered a total crime against modern music. Especially with this, the lead single off her sophomore effort, which should have been the breakaway pop hit needed to firmly establish her on the world music scene – a loving, wistful laundry list of wishes for an estranged lover that is jaunty, catchy and heartbreaking in equal measures. Plus, the way her voice just soars on the key change on the second chorus can’t help but melt the coldest of hearts. Gorgeous.
26 : Commander – Kelly Rowland
The start of 2009 was a scary time for Kelly Rowland. After almost ten years of ruling the pop landscape as part of American Girl Group juggernaut Destiny’s Child, she was beginning to be recognized solely as ‘The One Who Isn’t Beyonce’ and ‘The One Who Doesn’t Look Like An Extra From Planet Of The Apes’. But then French DJ extraordinaire David Guetta swooped in and got her to contribute vocals for his crossover dance smash hit When Love Takes Over and, suddenly, a career was reborn. Guetta repaid the favour with this aggressive slice of dominatrix club-pop from Rowland’s upcoming third solo album. Hopefully, this will open the door for Kelly’s time in the spotlight yet.
25 : Boys – Gabriella Cilmi
Turns out the one thing that no one wanted from the 2008 ARIA Award darling was an album full of disco and 80’s pop pastiches. Which means only approximately 17 people worldwide heard this, a bruised and defiant mid-tempo electro tale of girls being cheated on and kicking their guys to the curb. The “Go sleep with your boys tonight” chorus was born to be an ironic gay anthem much more than failed lead single ever was and, in an ideal world, would have been the lead single instead.
24 : Broken Heels – Alexandra Burke
You can never consider your life truly lived until you’ve seen a Drag Queen perform this ‘live’. Think about it, the meta irony level it would bring to the performance (a man pretending to be a woman singing a song about how women can do anything better than men ever wearing broken heels) would be like watching Victoria / Victoria condensed down to 3:30” and told in reverse. The tune, by the 2008 UK X-Factor winner, is pretty damned amazing too, carried along with a breakneck beat and diva attitude to spare.
23 : Acapella – Kelis
After a nasty divorce (with American rap savant Nas), a flop album and a few years in wandering the career wilderness, US purveyor of dairy-inspired r’n’b pop Kelis turned her attentions to the dancefloor and a disco diva was well and truly born. Produced by David Guetta and taking its cues from Donna Summer, this sublime slice of club pop should have been the biggest hit of her career but never quite crossed over to commercial radio. Which is a shame since this ode to her newborn son has a chorus is just spine-tingling gloriousness – “Before you, my whole life was acapella” might just be the pop lyric of the year.
22 : The Flood – Take That
Who knew that all it would take for Robbie to record the perfect ‘Robbie Williams anthem’ again would be rejoining his former band Take That? Rather than being an admission of waning popularity of either’s part, the new album saw both acts reinvigorated musically and creatively. Whilst this, the lead single from 2010’s fastest selling album in the UK, might have played it the safest, it was still a piece of mature power pop perfection. Emotive vocals? Check. Anthemic chorus? Check. Stirring lyrics? Check and check. Suddenly, manband wasn’t a dirty word anymore…
21 : Rich Kids – Washington
Because CLEARLY not enough people (even with a top three album and a bucketload of ARIA nominations) are familiar with the total amazingness that is Megan Washington. One of the best singers and songwriters to out of the Australian music scene in years. Can’t even remember the last time I have been so genuinely excited for a debut album to be released. Cement cleaned up the Triple J Hottest 100 last year and this bouncey treat of a track proves that the best is yet to come.
20 : Get Outta My Way – Kylie Minogue
It’s been a bit of a topsy-turvy year for old Kylie. First, new album Aphrodite was hailed as a long awaited return to form by critics and the gay community alike, and then all the subsequent singles were met with complete and utter indifference. Which is a shame as this, the 2nd single (and pretty much her worst charting to date, ever), was amazing. The catchiest, most exuberant thing she’s done since Spinning Around, you have to wonder whether a Minogue will ever top the singles chart again. If Kylie was able to move her face right now, you know it wouldn’t be smiling.
19 : New York City’s Killing Me – Ray LaMontagne & The Pariah Dogs
Beg, Steal or Borrow may have been the track that managed to squeak through and nab a surprise Song of the Year nomination, but it was this, a mournful, bluesy lament about being stranded in the Big Smoke, that was the albums true highlight. Rarely has LaMontagne’s famous raspy, cigarette and whiskey-soaked voice sounded more soulful or sad. Loneliness and isolation have never sounded so good.
18 : Indestructible – Robyn
Lead single Dancing On My Own sometimes felt like Robyn was writing to a formula and was fully aware of her newly carved niche in the music industry as the go to girl for tear-stained dance numbers. Indestructible, however, was a different beast all together – colder and faster beats, like being trapped inside a computer in the Artic Circle, were complimented by the a earnest, yearning vocal performance and the most optimistically hopeful lyrics of her career – “I’m gonna love you like I’ve never been hurt before, I’m gonna love you like I’m indestructible’. The fact that this is STILL only the second best song she released in 2010 is a swedish pop triumph in itself!
17 : Dear John – Taylor Swift
Otherwise known as the exact moment that John Mayer got his ass handed to him in song by a nineteen year old. Sometimes, you just have to pray that Taylor Swift is nothing more than a studio-funded front for a cotillion of really talented songwriters as no nineteen year old should be able to so clearly understand and be able to articulate the intricacies of love and heartbreak so succinctly. One of the best written songs of the year hands down (solely written by Swift) that should finally convince the naysayers that she is a genuine talent to be watched and admired.
16 : Hollywood – Marina & The Diamonds
The fact that Marina Lambrini Diamandis wasn’t the breakout crossover popstar of 2010 is somewhat of a major pop injustice. Really, almost all of the singles off her debut The Family Jewels could have made the list (in particular, my apologies for not including I Am Not A Robot), but this tale of a woman unhealthily obsessed with US celebrity culture (“Hollywood infected my brain/I’m living in a movie scene puking American dreams”) was a complete fizzy-pop standout. The “Oh! My! God! You look just like Shakira. No, no, you’re Catherine Zeta – Actually my name’s Marina…” bit at the 1:19 mark remains the best self-referential moment in pop music since Miley was busy “just being Miley”. GREAT song too.
15 : Pacific Coast Highway – Hole
The only genuinely great song off the last Hole album. Like an older, gentler and wiser cousin to late nineties career highpoint Malibu, Love sings her heart out and reminds you that, when she’s focussed, she’s still one of the best singers and songwriters of all time. Brings back memories of a time when Courtney Love wasn’t just a crack whore – she was a crack whore with talent.
14 : Dinosaur – Kisschasy
Australian rock band Kisschasy just keep getting better and better, especially on this, the final single from their third Long Player. Between the adorable animated video of fighter jet-riding dinosaurs and the tender, yearning lyrics of a love that will never die, you’d be hard pressed to find a more beautiful track. If you weren’t listening to Triple J this year, you probably didn’t hear it. You really should have.
13 : In The Sun – She & Him
So many actors have tried to become credible musicians over the years (We’re looking at you Keanu, Bruce Willis and David Hasslehoff), but few have done it with such success as indie film pixie Zooey Deschanel’s side project She & Him. Beautifully sunny 60’s style pop melodies combined with that voice and produced one of the true highlights of the year. Put this on your iPod and you can’t help but feel like it’s summer all year round, at least for three glorious minutes. The video is retro-fantastic perfection as well!
12 : Promise This – Cheryl Cole
What can be said about Cheryl Tweedy-Cole that hasn’t already been said? Already the most famous woman in the United Kingdom that is not currently marrying into the Royal Family, she finally released a song worthy of her level of pop fame (let alone, finally one that matched the dizzying highs of her former band Girls Aloud). Sure, the random french chanting doesn’t pack quite the same punch in a post-Gaga pop landscape, but the translation (roughly “Lark, spread your wings”) was a beautiful flourish on this up-tempo scorned stormer of a track. And she looked right stunning in the video – which showed just what kind of amazingness she could produce when the record company finally shelled out more than a tenner.
11 : F##k You – Cee-Lo
Where would the world music scene have been without this, its most inescapable and profane track. Popping up everywhere from the Grammy nominations to an episode of Glee, it was impossible to resist. By October, Doctors were using this, instead of the more traditional stethescope, to see whether people were truly alive. Amazingly vicious lyrics and a toe-tappingly brilliant backing track, few songs shone brighter than this number from Cee-Lo’s debut solo album. Except, of course, for the following ten on our countdown…
Top 50 Songs of 2010: #50-31
(Originally published here on 27th December 2010. Special shout out to Makersten for punching up my intro one million times better than my original one was!)
Massive dancefloor hits mingle with stunning tracks which deserved much more attention as we begin our countdown of the music which owned the past year. How many of these do you love?
Anything that was on an album or received a single release in 2010 is eligible – and tracks have been selected on the basis of what we either couldn’t stop or should have been listening to this year – find your favourites and press play on a few you haven’t heard before.
We’ll be running them down over the next few days, so keep checking back as the countdown continues and feel free to leave comments naming the tracks YOU think must be included – or any you think have no right to be here on our list!
Here we go then…
50 : Empire State Of Mind (Part II) Broken Down – Alicia Keys
Kicking off our list we have a reworking of what was arguably one of the best tracks of 2009. Stripping her already classic Jay-Z collaboration down to just a piano and that voice, Empire State Of Mind became even more affecting. New verses shone a light on the seedier aspects of the original and the chorus continued to send shivers down the spine all over again.
49 : Tik Tok – Ke$ha
Sure, this was possibly the most over-played song of 2010 (well, besides all the Katy Perry singles anyway). And yes, it is hard to get past the fact that most of the time she looks like The Junk Lady from Labyrinth. In fact, this almost ended up as #1 on a ‘Worst Tracks Of 2010’ list instead.
But, when you look past the radio saturation and garbage-chic styling, there is something so undeniably, well, FUN about this song. And, if it weren’t for the fact Robyn released Body Talk Part 1 this year, “Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy” would be a clear winner for Best Opening Line Of A Song Of The Year.
48 : Eyes Wide Open – Gotye
On the other end of the spectrum, we have Gotye, who should be one of the most overplayed artists but is still criminally ignored by commercial radio. Floating around the periphery of the Australian music scene for the past few years, 2006’s amazing Like Drawing Blood finally got the attention of the JJJ community and managed to snag a few ARIA Award nominations in the process. Hopefully this, a pounding slice of emotionally affecting electronica, will help draw in new fans..
47 : Drummer Boy – Alesha Dixon
The most gloriously noisy three and a half minutes of pop music since Girls Aloud unleashed Sexy! No, No, No.. on an unsuspecting public back in 2007. You can literally hear the producers banging around ON the kitchen sink from about the 30 second mark onwards. Plus, “I need a better Drummer Boy, hit me with your stick..” is the best euphemism for private parts since Vanessa Williams referred to her vagina as ‘The Comfort Zone’.
46 : Wonderful Life – Hurts
Hurts caused a bit of a splash with the indie music press in the UK this year. Sadly, even with heavily discounting their debut album here and literally giving away songs free on iTunes has yet to see them make much impact here. Which is a shame, since this moody synth-pop tale (think Pet Shop Boys on Xanax) of a man on the brink of suicide being saved by a beautiful woman is haunting and cautiously hopeful. Bonus points for the amazing Kylie Radio 1 Live Lounge cover:
45 : Whip My Hair – Willow
If there was an award for the most age inappropriate song on this list, we’d be looking at the winner right here. Seriously, listening to the nine year old spawn of two Hollywood superstars bang on about “the haterz” and her “getting her swag on” almost gave you pause to call Child Protection Services. After all, the last thing anyone needs is another Lindsay Lohan. But, with a track this addictive and an paint-flippingly fun video, there is no denying Willow’s right to whip her hair back and forth this summer. Plus, you just know Rihanna is sitting around somewhere sticking pins in a Willow Smith Voodoo wishing she had’ve gotten her mitts on this track first.
44 : Sideways – Sheryl Crow
When Sheryl Crow announced that her latest album was going to be a sort of ‘Sheryl Crow does the music of Dusty Springfield’ number, you could be forgiven for thinking that she was just trying to belatedly jump on the same Winehouse-tastic bandwagon that Duffy, Adele et al have been riding the past few years. So, imagine the collective shock when the ensuing album 100 Miles From Memphis turned out to be one of the year’s best. Who knew that Crow’s voice was so suited to the same sort of bruised and buoyant soul that Springfield did so well. And never more so than this, a heartbreakingly perfect tale of unwanted feelings that never go away.
43 : Ego – The Saturdays
With the wheels slowly falling off the Girls Aloud bandwagon the past few years and the inevitable solo albums of varying quality followed, the UK was in dire of a new girlband to save pop music. Whilst never reaching the dizzying creative highs of their predecessors, The Saturdays still emerged as a surprisingly enjoyable pop alternative. Their second album might have lost its way a little in its quest for a more mature sound, but Ego proved their was still a much needed place for a credible girlband in modern music, especially with a bitingly brilliant put down of a track like this. Great Gotham City-inspired clip too!
42 : Bobblehead – Christina Aguilera
“I never play dumb to get what I want,” proclaimed Aguilera towards the end of this, one of the five bonus tracks tacked on the end of the Deluxe Edition of this years commerical and critical flop Bionic. So why then, one wonders, did she fill the regular edition of the album with so many oversexed, under-baked Lady Gaga knock offs? Because when Aguilera really let loose, like on this divisive, experimental hybrid of Hollaback Girl and Stupid Girls that proved to have more bite than either. In fact, all five of the albums bonus tracks (six if you included iTunes-only Ladytron collaboration Little Dreamer) were better than anything on the main disc and are well worth tracking down.
41 : Starry Eyed – Ellie Goulding
Another one of the UK Music Press anointed ‘Sounds Of 2010’ that undeservedly never quite reached the same heights this side of the world. A euphoric slice of twinkling dance-pop, this was the breakaway pop hit of the album all over Europe. With uplifting lyrics that have just enough ambiguity about exactly what kind of high they’re outlining, it’s the perfect arms-aloft anthem that both pop and indie crowds alike can embrace.
40 : Sing – My Chemical Romance
Choruses didn’t come much bigger than on the 2nd single from emo-breakthrough act My Chemical Romance’s latest album. Large enough to land an A380 on, it was the kind of anthemic call to arms chorus that used to be U2’s bread and butter, before Bono decided he thought he could dance. Slinky and a little sexy, My Chemical Romance proved you could have your guyliner and wear it to the top of the charts too.
39 : Just Say So – Brian McFadden
After 2008’s surprise radio hit Twisted showed there was life in an old boybander yet, McFadden unleashed this – an unexpected balls to the wall autotuned bonafide dance smash hit. Produced by Kevin Rudolf and originally intended as a side project for McFadden, this topped the charts for almost a month. Filled with more synths, drum and bass than you can shake a disco stick at, commercial dance has rarely sounded so thrilling.
38 : Dancing On My Own – Robyn
If 2010 was Katy Perry’s year in terms of airplay, the it was clearly the Year Of Robyn as far as sheer volume of commercial releases go, with the year being buoyed by the Body Talk’s Part 1, 2 and 3. This, the lead single off Part 1, finds Robyn fine-tuning her trademark ‘crying at the discotheque’ routine that made her a superstar with previous hits Be Mine and With Every Heartbeat. Shimmering, tear-stained disco anthems didn’t come much better than this.
37 : Record Collection – Mark Ronson & The Business Intl
Super-Producer Ronson, responsible previously for sonically defining everyone from Amy Winehouse to Lily Allen, finally turns one ear to the future with this, the title track off his new album. Collaborating with Duran Duran’s Simon Le Bon and Nick Rhodes on the glacial robo-funk of the title track, “I only want to be in your record collection and I’ll do anything it takes just to get there” might be the most ominously sexy line of the year.
36 : If I Had You – Adam Lambert
Storming his way across the pop landscape throughout the year, Adam Lambert proved there was both life and genuine talent in the tired American Idol format. With all the energy and feral intensity of a pre-fame Lady Gaga, he dominated radio both sides of the Atlantic with this sexy electro-glam strut of a track, cementing his position of one of the most promising and charismatic entertainers working today.
35 : All The Lovers – Kylie Minogue
They said she was over. They said she was done. They said she couldn’t move her face anymore. Turns out, they were wrong (well, about the first two, anyway) as Miss Minogue bounced back with this critically adored slice of euphoric Euro dance-pop. A wistful, joyous ode to new love, All The Lovers proved there was life in the old girl yet, helping drive 11th (11th!) studio album Aphrodite to the top of the charts in the middle of the year. Subsequent singles may not have fared so well, but this sonic sequel to I Believe In You proved that, when on form, no one does classy pop better than our Kylie.
34 : Money Can’t Buy You Class – Countess Luann
..but it can buy you a bucketload of autontune. Viewers of The Real Housewives Of New York City will be familiar with the amazingly haughty antics of Countess Luann. Unlike the rest of her musically aspirational reality TV counterparts, The Countess has come out with a record that perfectly encapsulates her as a personality and as a brand. A series of half-spoken ettiquette instructions for the modern woman over a suprisingly danceable disco beat, you can’t help but smile and sing along.
33 : Circle The Drain – Katy Perry
2010 was definitately the year of Katy Perry, with her signature brand of bubblegum fun (California Gurls, Teenage Dream and Firework) ruling the airwaves, downloads and even the recent Grammy nominations. But it was this, a gloriously bitter Alanis-styled electro rock number about a drug-addicted boyfriend (Travis McCoy from Gym Class Heroes fame, step on up!), that hinted at the real person beneath all the fairy floss and whipped cream bikinis. With keenly observed lyrics, anguished vocals and a immense chorus, maybe there’s hope for the newly minted Mrs. Brand yet.
32 : Can’t Be Tamed – Miley Cyrus
And, with a pair of leather hot pants and a giant set of black wings, the Mileybird refused to be caged anymore. Or tamed, even. But don’t let the nude photo scandals, racist photo scandals and drug-taking photo scandals (sensing a trend?) fool you – her coming out anthem was pitch-perfect. With just the right amount of anger, attitude and sexual energy, there might be a credible music career in the old (young) bird yet…
31 : F*kin’ Perfect – Pink
Just because you’re popping out a Greatest Hits for Christmas doesn’t mean you have to relax on the quality control, which Pink proves in spades with this, one of two tracks recorded for her first Greatest Hits collection. A perfect blend of the raw, emotive pop and the kind of distinct lyrical content that made her famous, this shows that ten years in, no one does pop quite like Pink.
Things That Make Me Happy : Dumbest Survivor Ever Edition
Amazing (and not just for the oversized decorative poncho that Ozzy is wearing). For 20 seasons, this was probably the single best Tribal Council until Parvati zapped JT with 27 hidden immunity idols during Heroes vs Villains. So, the key takeaway here is that Parvati should be on every season of Survivor, ever. An occasional sprinkle of Cirie wouldn’t hurt either..
12/25
(Originally posted here on 20th December 2010)
In the grand tradition of Wham and Mariah Carey (ummm, maybe that’s using the term ‘grand’ a bit too loosely..), here is last year’s attempt at a Glenn Oke Kristmas Klassic. Took a bit of artistic license using the USA dating system (well, considering it’s *about* an american..) and maybe subbing in ’07 for ’05, but still.. One of my favourite things I’ve ever written.
12/25
it’s 12/25 again and you’re not here again
and i’m remembering ’07 when you and i were at my friends
and we caught the train back and forth all day, we went from place to place
and i can still remember all the snowflakes melting on your face
and then you say you love me and i say i feel the same
and you tell me that i’m special, oh my god how things have changed
but you meant it when you said it and i hope you don’t regret it
cuz i mean it when i say it when i’m drunk
and i call you on the phone
wondering if you’re all alone
cuz i love you so much that it burns a hole in my soul..
defying logic and reason
my heart is breaking each season
and i love you so much i still lose control..
it’s 12/25 again and you’re not here again
and it’s been a year since everything i feared finally happened
and i’ve been through twelve hundred since i last held you in my arms
but i always turn the lights out so i can see your face in the dark
and then they say they love me and i never feel the same
and i tell them that they’re special but i just don’t feel that way
and god i’m oh so lonely now with every season past
and i just wish that i could see you again..
and i call you on the phone
wondering if you’re all alone
cuz i love you so much that it burns a hole in my soul..
defying logic and reason
my heart is breaking with each and every season
and i love you so much i still lose control..
I Will Never Be Naked Again
(Originally posted here on 8th December 2010)
Kind of don’t really want to talk about it or anything (I realise the semi absurdity since this is FB!), but this is just an easier way of explaining to all my friends who’ve wondered why I’ve been such a moody, neurotic douchebag the last few days. Just a song I wrote this morning – it’s nice to at least have something to write about again *shrugs*
‘i will never be naked again’
so you told me
and i just smile along
cuz i get it
when things go wrong you just have to move on
but you say that you wanna be my friend, my friend?
what kind of friend would ever want me to pretend, when..
every time you say hello
i’ll have you know
that i will keep it in the back of my head
so every time that you come on
i won’t let on
but i will never be naked again
for every tear down my cheek
and every word i’m unable to speak
i will keep it all inside
til i can no longer hide
and it seeps out my skin
and fuels this shell i live within
and every time you say hello
i’ll have you know
that i will keep it in the back of my head
so every time that you come on
i won’t let on
but i will never be naked again
and today
when i walked through the traffic i got to the middle and i stopped
and i wait for the metal to meet my bones
before i wake up
for every tear down my cheek
and every word i’m unable to speak
i will keep it all inside
til i can no longer hide
and it seeps out my skin
and feeds this shell i live within
and every time you say hello
i’ll have you know
that i will keep it in the back of my head
so every time that you come on
i won’t let on
but i will never be naked again
and i
always hoped
that i would find forever, find forever
but i
never got
my hopes up high
and i never will
again
For Dean Who Never Called
(Originally posted here on 5th December 2010)
An old song I wrote years ago that I’ve had stuck in my head lately. Unfortunately, have lost the audio files of the music, so if anyone is a good guitar player (I’m rubbish), feel free to give me a shout.. I always find it funny how I’ll write a song about one thing, but it will often prove to be more relevant to my life at some other point down the track..
‘for dean who never called’
you scare me with how much you could hurt me
you thrill me with how much you make me sing
about everything
you scare me with how much you make me smile
just at the thought that you might call
if you call at all
my hearts in my throat
i’m starting to choke
my hearts in my mouth
i might spit it out
just to get it out
and i don’t wanna let on
exactly what’s going on
exactly what’s going on
with me inside
can’t no longer hide it
and i don’t want the first time to be the last time
to be the last time
now that i found you, so
and it just occurred to me in this blur that you made of me
this blur that you made of me
that i might love you so
one day
you thrill me with how much you make me change
you scare me with how much i rearrange
my life for you
you thrill me with how much you make me see
you scare me with just how damned good it could be
to be with you
my hearts in your hands
you don’t understand
my heart doesn’t know
cause you wont say so
but just don’t let go
and i just wanna let it out
tell you what its all about
really just scream and shout
of how i love you
oh i love you
and i don’t want the first time
to be the last time
to be the last time
now that i found you so
and it just occurred to me
in this blur that you made of me
this blur that you made of me
that i might love you, so..
one day..
Gwyneth On Glee
(Originally published here on 27th November 2010)
Previously on Glee – Everyone started hallucinating about Britney Spears, Finn thought he saw Jesus in a Grilled Cheese Sandwich, Santana and Brittany made out and everyone did the Time Warp(again).
Then last week, Glee’s upward spiral of general amazingness peaked with a heart wrenchingly raw gay bullying storyline that ended with the shock of Kurt being kissed by his closeted tormentor.
So, how exactly does one top what was arguably one of the single biggest TV water cooler moments of the year? You can see show creatorRyan Murphy sitting in his office pondering this very question before a cartoon light bulb goes off above his head and he jumps up and yells “I know – I’ll get Gwyneth Paltrow to guest star!”
Now, this should have been an awful idea. Awful. Anyone who watched Murphy’s previous network show Nip/Tuck would know all too well the pain of watching a brilliant series spend almost four seasons collapsing under the very weight of stunt casting and a cavalcade of guest stars who chewed up hours of screen time (and scenery) and added little.
But, on Monday Night, something magical happened. Gwyneth was good. Like, ‘give this woman the Best Guest Actress in a Television Musical or Comedy Emmy’ good. It’s so easy to forget under the snooty accent, rock star husband and insufferable GOOP website, there is one of the best actresses of our generation. This range, plus a free and easy lack of attitude, snappy comic timing and bucketloads of charisma was on full display, making Gwynnie’s Holly Holliday possibly the single most likable one-off character on Glee to date.
The best part was her substitute Spanish Teacher fit so easily within the existing storylines and brought out the best in the rest of the main cast, facilitating the plot and character development. When Will and a large portion of the school is knocked out with a particularly nasty bout of Monkey Flu (really), Holly is bought in to look after Will’s Spanish Class. One highly spirited Spanish language deconstruction of Lindsay Lohan’s sobriety and a hilarious English Class performance ofConjunction Junction later, Holly is leading the Glee Club as they finalise their set list for sectionals. Her graceful glide across the room as she sidesteps a pranked greased up floor is possibly the most winning Paltrow has been since 1998’s Sliding Doors.
Forget You:
Even better is watching Gwyneth’s serenade the club into submission with a rousing rendition of Cee-Lo’s Forget You. If Paltrow’s vocal chops are only a step or two up from ordinary, her performance skills suggest that she may indeed be the second coming of Beyonce. The sheer charisma and energy that is thrown into the number makes it a serious contender for top Glee number of all time.
In fact, Holly is SO likeable and endearing and just plain bonkers fun that it’s easy to forget that there was a whole episode worth of moments from the other characters. Terri came back for long enough to remind us exactly why she has zero reason to ever come back again. Poor Jessalyn Gilsig, who is so great at playing a downright bitch, is continually wasted in the show, although her sparring with Paltrow was worthy of an eighties soap opera. Sue took control of the school as acting Principal and managed to accomplish pretty much nothing but banning junk food and instating Becky as her secretary (in what was easily the nights best running gag).
Mercedes, unfortunately, was saddled with ridiculous and unrewarding subplot about leading the students in protest against the healthy eating tyranny of Sue Sylvester. All because she wanted Tater Tots. Now, Mercedes is one of the best characters on the show and Amber Rileyhas managed to turn what was essentially a complete caricature in the pilot into a flesh and blood person who is as sassy as she is tender and surprising. So it would be nice to see her given a plotline that revolved around something other than her weight. Much better was her growing disdain for Kurt and Blaine’s burgeoning friendship (?) – the scene at Breadstix (yay!) where she hallucinates the conversation devolving into the word ‘Gay’ being repeated 270 times was absurd comic genius as well as having a raw undercurrent of emotional truth. How many young gay men reading can say they haven’t given their best gal pals the exact same third wheel treatment when in the throes of young gay love? Bonus points for bringing back the (teenage) dreamy Darren Criss as Blaine – hopefully the rumours of him being promoted to series regular are true!
The show stopping mash-up of Singing in the Rain was a definite highlight and one of the best numbers to date as far as sheer production values go. Have to wonder how much longer suspension of disbelief will be required in order to accept that the school’s budget could put on a production of that standard once a year, let alone every other week. Also, we’re left wondering whether the use of the bright yellow umbrella means Gwyneth is actually the titular character fromHow I Met Your Mother.
Umbrella / Singing In The Rain:
In the end, a strong episode with a winning guest turn and some series-best musical numbers. Thankfully, the door is left open for Paltrow’s return and, for both her career and the show’s sake; hopefully we’ll see some more of the delightfully daffy Holly Holliday before the seasons end. Oh, also, Matt Morrison got shirtless again, so score!
Top Quotes:
Brittany – “Mr. Schu taught me the second half of the alphabet. I stopped after M and N. I thought they sounded too similar and got frustrated.”
Sue (to Will) – “You make the underflaps of my breasts burn like when I used to rub them with poison sumac.”
Terri (questioning Holly Holliday’s name) – “Are you a porn star or a drag queen?”
Holly (bonding with Sue) – “Hoarders and red wine? I’m buzzzzzzzed!!!”
Sue (on a piece of broccoli) – “When I showed this to Brittany, she whimpered and thought I cut down a small tree where a family of gummy people lived.”
Holly (in Spanish) – Please get into groups and discuss how many times Lindsay Lohan has been in rehab.
Mini Rachel – I for one think we should use our set list for Sectionals to start exploring the oeuvre of Bernadette Peters.
Mini Brittany – Someday, I’m gonna go to Paris and visit the oeuvre.
the from the block blog 