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Dating In Reverse

May 18, 2011

So, guess who has a date this coming Sunday?  That’s right!  ME.  Who woulda thunk it, hey?

It’s funny, but I actually genuinely can’t remember the last time I went on a real date.  I mean, I guess some of what Michael and I did earlier this year could be considered dates, but we’d been (genuinely) really close for the months leading up to that whole, ummm, thing so the time we spent together wasn’t normal dating per se as the ‘getting to know you’ period was already over and done with (Coming Up Next!  10 Reasons Why Dating Your Best Friend Is A Bad Idea – only at

And Sweet Jesus, before that, I think it’s been at least a year since I actually acquiesced and went on a date proper.  Maybe a year and a half (I want to say Bruce, November 2009?  Prove me wrong kids, prove me wrong..)  It’s not that I don’t get asked out for dates or anything, it’s just that I rarely meet people I see as potential equals.  I guess that’s one of the pitfalls of being marvelously self-possessed?

But this is like a proper date.  With a guy.  Who I know barely anything about but really kinda like.  And it’s funny, because I’m so out of form with it all.  Like, what am I supposed to do?  What do the kids *do* on dates these days anyways?  Sheesh – I need to get another drink just to keep typing this..

That’s better.

Okay, so where were we?  Oh, yeah right.. Dating in reverse.  So I’ve got this date on Sunday with this guy.  His name is, ummm, Guy From My Gym Who I’ve Already Seen Naked (I’m going with code names from now on because, evidently, guys don’t like you using their names in a blog when you’re doing something as sensational as recounting THINGS THAT HAPPENED IN REAL LIFE.  #whoknew).  So yeah, GFMGWIASN and I have a real romantic meeting story.  Wanna here it?

So, I was sitting in the steam room at the gym post-workout and there was this really sexy dude sitting opposite me.  Now, at my gym, the steam rooms are divided by gender (kinda like the buses and the courtrooms were back in 1940’s America).  So we’re sitting there, chilling, chilling , minding our business and, well, here’s the thing.  When you have two guys sitting naked opposite each other in a steam room, it’s kind of, well, OBVIOUS, when one naked male ‘fancies’ the other male.  Now, don’t get me wrong – NOTHING HAPPENED in the steam room.  Well, except for the fact that you could clearly tell he appreciated my post workout state.  Or, at the very least, the contents of his lap did – know what I’m sayin?

ANYWAY.  So I had my shower and he followed suit.  And then I got changed and he followed suit.  So I’m like – well, I’m 29 years old, what do I have to lose, right?  Like, clearly I know he’s attracted to me on account of all the wood I spent the last ten minutes watching him try to hide.. So I waited out the front and the exchange went something like this :-

Glenny : Hey
Glenny : I’m Glenn
Glenny : What’re you up to now?
GFMGWIASN : I’m going to meet a friend in about 40 minutes for coffee, you?
Glenny : Oh, you know, I’m just walking home.  Wanna walk me home?
Glenny : Well, this is my home.. Wanna come  up?

And, well, you get the rest.. Right?  I mean, I’d draw you a diagram but it turns out I’m not that good with whatever the Macbook equivalent of Microsoft Paint is.. But, yeah, ‘The Sex’ happened.  And it was excellent.  Even though I was trying to keep it to a strict time limit because no one likes a guy who makes them late to dates with friends, right?

Now, normally, that would be it.  But, the kissing was reeeaaaaallly good.  And the sex was REALLY GOOD.  But, do you know what the piece de resistance was, so to speak?  He started asking about the book on my beside table.  And then went into an amazingly literate monologue about what both that particular author and that book (‘Almost Moon’ by Alice Sebold) had meant to him.  DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS IN SYDNEY TO FIND A GUY WHO CAN READ (GROWN UP) BOOKS?  Amazing.  And a plan for a date was born.

See what I mean kiddies?  Dating In Reverse.  AMAZING.

So yeah.  Here I am, all excited about having a real bona fide date with someone who can not only hold a conversation with me (no mean feat) but can engage in amazingly smart but non-pretentious discourse on books and other equally sexy topics.  We’ve had a dozen or so text messages back and forth now and you know what the best part is?  He hasn’t abbreviated A SINGLE WORD.  Not one.  They’re all written, spelled and punctuated properly.  Hashtag SO Sexy.

That’s basically it then until Sunday (Sunday).  I mean, I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to meet the love of my life in a gym steam room or anything far-fetched like that (if my experiences earlier this year taught me nothing at all, it’s that pretty much no feeling, no matter how strong, can ever be relied upon, no matter how honest you are) but it’s definitely nice to be around someone who at least is both an intellectual and (almost) physical equal.  It’s fun.  And Lord knows I deserve some of that!

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